Drunken Wisdom by Mos

THINGS THAT ARE  DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
 1. Innovative
 2. Preliminary
 3. Proliferation
 4. Cinnamon

 THINGS THAT ARE  VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
 1. Specificity
 2. Anti-constitutionalistically
 3. Passive-aggressive disorder
 4. Transubstantiate

 THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
 1. No thanks, I'm married.
 2. Nope, no more  booze for me!
 3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
 4. Taco  Bell ? No thanks, I'm not hungry.
 5. Good evening, officer.. Isn't it  lovely out tonight?
 6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing  karaoke.
 7. I'm not interested in fighting you.
 8. Thank you, but  I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no
      coordination. I'd hate to  look like a fool!
 9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee  in this parking  
      lot or on the side of the road.
10. I must be going  home now, as I have to work in the morning.

One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was Obama. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward. The first boy wanted $10,000, so Obama gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Obama gave the boy a Ferrari. The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Obama said, “Why do you want one of those, son, you're not handicapped.” The boy replied, “I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved.”

MOS

KEY WEST MOS?  SAY IT AIN'T SO DUDE

......and I should quit the counter top racket and start delivering pizzas and start supporting Obama and buy even MORE booze and install a putting green on my front lawn....and those are just a few of the ideas that are rattling around in my melon.  I'll keep you posted.

THIS MIGHT BE AS HARD TO SWALLOW AS A HORSE PILL

"Even if one takes every reefer madness allegation of the prohibitionists at face value,

marijuana prohibition has done far more harm to far more people than marijuana ever could."   

- William F. Buckley, Jr.